Back In Black

I've been getting back into my darker mood recently, which of course for most people would be alarming, but for me it's a natural state of affairs, it doesn't mean of course that I am miserable or anything like it.  I love my dark side and it loves me.  I've invested over the last few weeks in some digital albums from some of my favourite bands Christian Death, The Awakening, Blutengel and The March Violets as well as supporting Irish musicians Venus De Vilo and The Dystopian Project.  All of it is inspiring ideas of wonderfully dark things, from photography through to downright perversion.  Now all I need is some people to join the fun and things will be able to kick off.  Maybe later in the year then?

In other news I have been thinking that I want a lot of things to happen this year, I have already mentioned my trip to Versailles but I also fancy having another break, but for longer also this summer.  Quite what that will be I don't know.  More on that as the idea forms. In part it will depend where I am in work, whether it be the job I am in or something else. 

The job hunt is being slow but that doesn't really bother me as I know something will come my way eventually, I have no problem with that as I want to change jobs to something I will hopefully use to form a long and secure working pattern only leaving a job for promotion and enjoying the company I work with and also being paid a reasonable sum for a man for my talents.

I had a nice surprise this week at work.  I've been working hard to get a system from one of the companies we work for working on our system with one of their IT people, the guy was really nice and helpful and friendly with it.  In all honesty I was just really thinking of myself and how much easier it would be if the system worked for me.  Friday morning I went into work and the first thing I see is an email from the manager who is in charge of implementation of said system so I read it, I get a mention from her thanking me for my work to get it working, then I see the guy's boss has also thanked me for my help and professionalism.  My head swelled even more when I saw it went to all the bosses and quite a lot of the workers in my part of the organisation and beyond.  I had what will be hopefully a final chat with the guy I worked with and he told me that he'd worked with people from my office before and I was the first one who had really showed any interest and was prepared to work with him, the others apparently it was like they couldn't be bothered.  It made me feel happy to say the least as it will be something positive when it comes to references.

I won't say I feel invulnerable right now, but I still am seeing strength in my inner self growing on a daily basis which is a beautiful feeling as I haven't felt like this for a long time.  I have a long way to go to where I want to be, but it's progress.

My mind has been wandering to various memories that I have no idea what sparked them to come back to the front of my brain recently all of them adult in nature and all of them in some respects delightful though one of them I have to say I did wonder why the hell the woman involved was involved with hindsight, she's not part of my life and hasn't been for 7 or more years now and I have only given her fleeting thoughts during that time.  So it’s strange, maybe my mind is trying to tell me something about what I should be doing in the future?

I haven’t done much in the way of photography this week, though I have bought a few cheap items that I want for my cameras and accessories, there are still a few more expensive items to buy but mostly my photographic needs are sorted.  One of the few big purchases I want is a new (to me) laptop that has a bigger screen than this one and a large hard drive so I can do more editing and also enjoy movies closer to what it would be like on the TV.  Whilst we are on the topic of TVs I  am trying to persuade Dad to buy a flat screen TV of a decent size so that he can see things better when his eyes are playing up.